Please listen to Sam Berns philosophy for a happy life. It will make you feel happy and appreciate what you do have, rather than what you don't have.
The pain of infidelity is severe for both partners. Both partners need support for different reasons. Please read this article to see if it can help you work through the different areas of betrayal.
This article by the late Peggy Vaughan, author of the Monogamy Myth, deals with the instance where the person who had an affair has left the marriage but is ambivalent about whether or not to return and the spouse is ambivalent about whether or not to let them return.
The article can be downloaded here: Ambivalence About Returning to the Marriage
Men and women are often frustrated trying to communicate with each other. This video may give you insight into how women's brains differ from men's brains.
This is fun video. You can feel the frustration of the man in the couple, trying to understand what his partner is trying to say. You can also feel the women's frustration. All she wants is to be in heard. Watch and please send me comments.
"Don't try to fix it. I just need you to listen." Every man has heard these words. And they are the law of the land. No matter what.
TO HAVE A HAPPY MARRIAGE
There seems to be more articles written about the difficulties and pain of marriage than the beauty, contentment and love we all strive for. Please read a "feel good" list of what people in love have in their marriage. It is up to each of us to get what we want in our marriage.
Happy Marriage Quotes
“Marriage: Love is the reason. Lifelong friendship is the gift. Kindness is the cause. Til’ death do us part is the length.”
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”
“Being in a long marriage is a little bit like that nice cup of coffee every morning – I might have it every day, but I still enjoy it.”
“Happily ever after is not a fairy tale. It’s a choice.”
“The older I get, the less time I want to spend with the part of the human race that didn’t marry me.”
“A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.”
“The best time to love with your whole heart is always now, in this moment, because no breath beyond the current is promised.”
“To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness.”
“The difference between an ordinary marriage and an extraordinary marriage is in giving just a little ‘extra’ every day, as often as possible, for as long as we both shall live.”
“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.”
“Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.”
-Franklin P. Jones
“Where there is love, there is life.”
“Marriage is a mosaic you build with your spouse. Millions of tiny moments that create your love story.”
“The greatest marriages are built on teamwork. A mutual respect, a healthy dose of admiration, and a never-ending portion of love and grace.”
“Once we figured out that we could not change each other, we became free to celebrate ourselves as we are.”
-H. Dean Rutherford (in a letter to his wife on their 59th wedding anniversary)
“Love is the greatest gift when given. It is the highest honor when received.”
“A long-lasting marriage is built by two people who believe in -and live by- the solemn promise they made.”
“Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success.”
“A great marriage is not when the ‘perfect couple’ comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.”
“A great marriage isn’t something that just happens; it’s something that must be created.”
“Marriage is a commitment- a decision to do, all through life, that which will express your love for one’s spouse.”
-Herman H. Kieval
“Show me a man who is smiling from ear-to-ear and living a beautiful life, and I’ll show you a man who is grateful for what he has and utterly in love with his wife.”
“A fool in love makes no sense to me. I only think you are a fool if you do not love.”
“In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything and two minus one equals nothing.”
“Love is a partnership of two unique people who bring out the very best in each other, and who know that even though they are wonderful as individuals, they are even better together.”
“The doors of happiness remain locked. When they are unlocked, they swing open quickly and widely but close right behind them. They must be reopened throughout each day and there is but one key that fits that lock: Gratitude.”
“The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to forget is the happiest.”
“And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”
-John Lennon and Paul McCartney